Weblog

Friday, 14 August 2009

  • how many special people change?

    Im always trying to figure out how ive changed in the past 2 years since high school, and i think ive stayed relatively the same. i mean ive changed small things, i dont think im as loud as i once was, and i think im a little more laid back (most times). but there's some people that have just been really close to me who have made really big changes. maybe its easier to notice when its not you, i dont know, but the 2 people that ive seen change a lot, i dont think that im the only one who notices. its weird when people who were once really close to you, who you knew like the back of your hand, you suddenly cant really say what theyre going to do next. I can remember one of these people saying they hate when ppl do __ and when people act like ___ etc.. But what do you do when you watch, or hear of this person doing all these things that they hated, going to places they hate, and acting like the people they never wanted to be? do you call them out on it, or let them go? i also know that this person has watched a good amount of their friends change like this, and hated it, its funny now that im watching them be just like their old friends that they dont talk to anymore.  Another friend of mine has just changed all together too, to the point that i dont even know what to talk to them about. i know everyone needs to change and grow up, but why are people changing into people that suck?

Tuesday, 04 August 2009

  • summer

    i never write anymore because what is there to say when your life is the same? ive been on the same roller coaster for over 2 years. and have had the same emotions and feelings as always. this summer is the worst i can remember. yeah, theres been good nights, good days, but most of them have been boring, or just terrible. i cant wait to go back to school. and feel nothing.

Wednesday, 13 May 2009

  • I never really put much thought into it until yesterday. How many times do we feel so alone and so unloved that we will do anything to make people love us and care about us? Have you ever just wanted someone to love you so much that you thought about endangering your life so that maybe they would care? Maybe if you got sick and put in a hospital, you'd wake up and they would be sitting there crying, relieved that you're okay and they would care. finally. Why do people need a wake up call to realize that no ones going to be around forever? People don't notice you until you almost die. Sometimes people wonder if they ended up in the emergency room, who would come to see them? i wonder it all the time. How many people would send cards, flowers, and call and ask my family if i'm ok. my bet would be that anyone who has seen me, friends of friends, theyd all be wondering how i am. but why not now? i never really gave much thought to why people commit suicide, i just figured it was their confession that life was too hard for them. for some reason, i never really realized that to get any love from someone you need to risk your life. otherwise, we go on thinking that people are going to be around forever, theyre never going to leave us and death is just something that happens to other people. we hear all the time to seize the day, dont put off till tomorrow what you can do today, live everyday like its your last. but how many people actually do this? how many people could really say that if they died tomorrow theyd be okay with it. is it even possible to live everyday like its your last?

Sunday, 12 April 2009

  • Well since its Easter.

    No, I didn't go to church today. I didn't go on Christmas either. Oh, and i ate meat every single friday this Lent, and probably during almost every Lent. Apparently, since i did not go to church on the two biggest Roman Catholic holidays of the year, and i eat meat, i'm doomed to burn in hell my entire after-life. Since i don't identify with Roman Catholocism, as my family and the better half of my friends, i'm obviously agnostic or atheist... or i worship the devil. The only choices one has is being Catholic or Satanist, or i just dont believe in anything.

    Obviously, this pisses me off more than anything, because anytime religion comes up among my friends or family, i need to defend myself because everyone around me is closeminded. Well, not everyone, there are a few people that are able to agree with my stance on religion, but most laugh and ridiculous things like "have fun burning in hell."

    To clarify my views, i just think that choosing a religion is comparable to choosing a politcal party, or really anything that you identify with, or anything that you get to choose. I dont think that any one person could really agree with every single thing that one religion teaches, and i don't. I don't call myself Catholic because I'm pro-choice, I have nothing against gay marriage, I don't believe that one must go to church every week to be considered a good person, i don't think that eating meat on fridays has anything to do with anything. All of this, however, doesn't mean i don't believe in God, and it doesn't mean that i dont pray.

    To be honest, i find it a lie to go to church on holidays. If I think that what they're saying is contradictory, then why would i go? If i dont go to church every other sunday out of the year, then why bother going on religious holidays? I don't identify myself as Republican or Democrat because i can't say that i agree with either of them totally. So why identify myself with any religion if i don't totally agree with one? Is it even possible for someone to totally agree with just one religion? I suppose for some people, thats perfectly acceptable, and i'm no one to judge that. Whatever anyone believes, i think, is their own choice, their own right. And i don't have anything against what anyone believes, but because i classify myself as "other" that forces people to make judgements about my beliefs. 

    I just find that religion is a personal thing. It's something that one should form their own rules for. I just don't believe in organized religion. I think that i should be able to form my own thoughts about faith and after-life and all that, and i dont think i should be judged for having a mind of my own, as compared to listening to what everyone else believes in and following them. Is that so wrong?

Sunday, 08 March 2009

  • "Maybe true love is a decision. You know, a decision to take a chance with somebody. To give to somebody. Without worrying whether they'll give anything back. Or if they're going to hurt you, or if they really are the one. Maybe love isn't something that just happens to you, maybe its something that you have to choose." - Love and other Disasters.

    i wonder if love really is something you need to choose. To choose between getting to know someone or just not talking to them. So many people live their whole lives thinking that when they meet the person they're going to love, they know it right from the start, and without that initial breathlessness when they lay eyes on someone, they dont give it a chance. I wonder if it really is something that just grows on its own, or if we're supposed to be looking for that jolt of lightning when we first lock eyes with someone.  From my own experience, I cant really tell. When i met my ex boyfriend, i think we both annoyed the hell out of eachother and he was probably one of the last people i could see myself with. but then we became friends and ended up going out for a good amount of time. granted, we arent together anymore, but that doesnt mean i didnt love him or anything.  But anyway, there are people who just dont even give that a chance, to let love develop on its own. Is this the way we should be going? Or should we give everyone a chance to love them? Should we wait to be in a relationship until we find someone that immediately gives us a jolt in our hearts, or should we give the people we're maybe mildly attracted to a chance to know them?

Top Tags - Weblog

[no tags]

no3y101

  • Visit no3y101's Xanga Site
    • Name: Noelle
    • Birthday: 12/19/1988
    • Gender: Female
    • Member Since: 9/12/2008

Weblog Archives

Don't worry - your calendar is here… to see it in action just click "Save" above and refresh the page.

About Me

[no info]

Pulse

Photostrip

[no photos]

Recommended

[no recommendations]